Discussion:
Wedding Custom?
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David Amicus
2015-10-20 18:57:36 UTC
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I'm a fan of the British soap opera "Coronation Street". Current storyline a Muslim girl is going to marry a white boy in a secular ceremony. She observes Ramadan and does not drink alcohol.

She said there is one Muslim custom they could do. Her family and friends could steal the groom's shoes and he would have to buy them back.


Is anyone familiar with this wedding custom?
Yusuf B Gursey
2015-10-22 19:23:20 UTC
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Post by David Amicus
I'm a fan of the British soap opera "Coronation Street". Current storyline a Muslim girl is going to marry a white boy in a secular ceremony. She observes Ramadan and does not drink alcohol.
She said there is one Muslim custom they could do. Her family and friends could steal the groom's shoes and he would have to buy them back.
Is anyone familiar with this wedding custom?
Rest assured it's just folklore, if it is not simply made up, and not from Islamic law.
David Amicus
2015-10-22 20:11:42 UTC
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Post by Yusuf B Gursey
Post by David Amicus
I'm a fan of the British soap opera "Coronation Street". Current storyline a Muslim girl is going to marry a white boy in a secular ceremony. She observes Ramadan and does not drink alcohol.
She said there is one Muslim custom they could do. Her family and friends could steal the groom's shoes and he would have to buy them back.
Is anyone familiar with this wedding custom?
Rest assured it's just folklore, if it is not simply made up, and not from Islamic law.
I frequent a mom & pop store owned by Sikhs and I asked them. They were familiar with it. Thus it's a cultural thing and not religious. Don't know if it's just Indian or not.
Catherine Jefferson
2015-10-23 17:41:27 UTC
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Post by David Amicus
I frequent a mom & pop store owned by Sikhs and I asked them. They
were familiar with it. Thus it's a cultural thing and not religious.
Don't know if it's just Indian or not.
It isn't east African. (I asked my sister, whose ex-husband is from
there and who lived in Kenya recently for two years.) The Arabs I know
had never heard of it. So it's probably an Indian subcontinent thing,
and not ubiquitous there. I've been to a few Indian weddings (I lived
in Silicon Valley for almost 20 years), and I'm quite sure that if
anything of the sort had been done, I'd have heard. It's too good a
story not to have gotten out. ;)

I've never read anything of the sort in the Quran (which I've read
through in translation a couple of times) or the Hadith. This doesn't
sound like the sort of thing that would be a religious custom in any
religion, and especially not in Islam.
--
Catherine Jefferson <***@ergosphere.net>
Blog/Personal: http://www.ergosphere.net
y***@gmail.com
2015-10-23 19:33:35 UTC
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Post by Catherine Jefferson
Post by David Amicus
I frequent a mom & pop store owned by Sikhs and I asked them. They
were familiar with it. Thus it's a cultural thing and not religious.
Don't know if it's just Indian or not.
It isn't east African. (I asked my sister, whose ex-husband is from
there and who lived in Kenya recently for two years.) The Arabs I know
had never heard of it. So it's probably an Indian subcontinent thing,
and not ubiquitous there. I've been to a few Indian weddings (I lived
in Silicon Valley for almost 20 years), and I'm quite sure that if
anything of the sort had been done, I'd have heard. It's too good a
story not to have gotten out. ;)
I found it here for Indian weddings under the sub-heading "I hear the
bride and groom and their families play games ..."

http://web.stanford.edu/~gopi/personal/wedding/faq/

The part about henna is familiar to me from Turkey and Arab countries.
Henna is put on the bride's hand in a women pnly "bridal shower" the
night before the wedding known as the "henna night". There is not much
to an "Islamic wedding" as it is basically fixing a contract amongst
families, but consent is essential. The rest may be very elaborate
but is determined by local custom.
Post by Catherine Jefferson
I've never read anything of the sort in the Quran (which I've read
through in translation a couple of times) or the Hadith. This doesn't
sound like the sort of thing that would be a religious custom in any
religion, and especially not in Islam.
Catherine Jefferson
2015-10-23 20:39:12 UTC
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Post by y***@gmail.com
I found it here for Indian weddings under the sub-heading "I hear the
bride and groom and their families play games ..."
http://web.stanford.edu/~gopi/personal/wedding/faq/
ROFL! This wasn't done at the weddings I've attended, but I think that
might be because only one of them was Hindu and the bride and groom for
that one were from southern India (Tamil-Nadu). That's as crazy as some
of our traditions in mainstream US and northern Europe.
Post by y***@gmail.com
The part about henna is familiar to me from Turkey and Arab countries.
Henna is put on the bride's hand in a women pnly "bridal shower" the
night before the wedding known as the "henna night". There is not much
to an "Islamic wedding" as it is basically fixing a contract amongst
families, but consent is essential. The rest may be very elaborate
but is determined by local custom.
I'm familiar with the henna tradition too; it's pretty widespread. I've
had American friends with no connection to the Middle East or Indian
subcontinent do this as a fun activity before the wedding.

My sister's wedding was quite simple. Her ex-husband and the father of
their son is Somali, although he and his family fled Somalia when he was
a child and he grew up elsewhere. The two of them appeared before a
Qadi in Cairo, and the whole process took less than a half hour. I
wasn't there, but she described it to the family later.

I've always regretted that she never got a wedding like I did. I'm not
naturally big on parties and ceremonies, and she is. It's pretty funny
that my wedding was a traditional Orthodox Christian wedding with
procession, crowning, and ritual, while hers was so simple. The ironies
of life....
--
Catherine Jefferson <***@ergosphere.net>
Blog/Personal: http://www.ergosphere.net
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